What was the process like?

The adoption process for us went fairly smoothly, but it still felt so long--it was a year and a half almost exactly from beginning to end. (which is shorter than it could have been and about what we were told to expect.) The first big step along the way was completing our home study--which is a report from a social worker about our family. It was really our first dip into the whole venture and I remember being so on edge before our social worker came for our first home study visit. We waited in a spotlessly clean house for him to arrive and when he did he was wearing a soccer uniform and flip flops and it was a casual, fun visit. He came back a few more times to finish up the interviews and we didn't clean for him anymore (very much). Once we had our homestudy completed we could fully compile our dossier.

The dossier is the big deal--it is all the gathered documents that are required by Hong Kong in order for us to be officially matched with Simon. Some of the documents in the dossier include notarized copies of birth certificates, marriage licence, diplomas, financial records, the home study and referral letters. It also included written answers by us to questions regarding our faith, our parenting, our marriage relationship, our strengths and weaknesses, our hobbies and interests, our community, religion, education and future goals. I remember all the introspection as I answered those questions making me feel like less than what I should be. When you think that much about yourself, you are reminded of all your weaknesses and of all the things you lack and sometimes that made me really anxious. It's still hard for me. For some reason I slip into feeling like Simon deserves a perfect mother, and that somehow by choosing to be his mother I was committing to the impossible task of being very close to perfect. I know all parents feel extra aware of their shortcomings and really want to be everything they imagine their children need, but with Simon, for some reason, that struggle has been more intense for me. It's been a challenge that I wasn't expecting.

For the dossier we also each had to have a physical, TB test, blood tests and have our doctors fill out a form about our health. It was the last bit that we needed before we could turn in our dossier and somehow we could not get it right. Every time we turned it in to our agency there was something we had missed and we had to go back to have the doctor resign and refill out paperwork at least five times so that the wording and acronyms and signatures were just right. Then we made cookies for the doctors office so they would maybe like us again.

After the dossier was turned in, in January of 2014, we waited for matching approval, which I felt like was the biggest moment in the process (other than travel) and by far the hardest wait. One morning Taylor had called our social worker, Mike, to check about something else and while he was on the phone Mike told him he had just received an email from Hong Kong that we had received matching approval. Taylor called to tell me and I was sweeping the kitchen and totally not expecting the news that morning and I cried all day because it was such a rush of relief and I was basically just a really emotional mess a lot of times while we were waiting for Simon. After matching approval we could breath a sigh of relief that Simon would really be ours. (not 100 percent sure cause things can always happen, but a really, really good chance) 

There were a few more steps during the process after matching approval--mostly paperwork to fill out in order to gain permission from both governments to adopt internationally. After we finished these steps, which took three or four more months, we waited to be told we could travel. In October we knew Simon was getting a visa and that it would be anytime, then we were told on October 20th that we could come to Hong Kong on November 3rd (two weeks later) for our week long stay. We were so, so ready to meet our little boy and bring him home (ready in all the ways we knew how to be ready).

(Simon receiving his teddy bear that we sent him after matching approval)