We left on Halloween to go get Simon. It was a crazy, busy day to leave our other kids on and we were so thankful for grandmas and grandpas staying with then. It was a Friday morning and the plan was for us to spend a day (but really more because of the time change) traveling, a day resting, and then see Simon on Monday morning. The flight felt so long to me; I could not wait to just be in the country where our little boy was.
After arriving we were able to sleep (while dreaming strange, stress-out dreams about Simon) and then on Sunday we set out to orient ourselves and figure out where restaurants, groceries, and subway stations were. We also found one of our church's congregations and were able to attend. The familiar music and spirit of that church meeting helped me feel calm and peaceful.
It was hard to sleep on Sunday night and we were up early. We were supposed to meet our social worker at noon in our hotel lobby and we were there waiting at 11:30. I remember thinking that it was the most stressed I think we've ever been at the same time. Neither of us said anything almost that entire half an hour. Finally, our social worker walked in and recognized us right away. (We didn't blend in very we'll in Hong Kong.) We sat down with her and went over paperwork and then followed her out the door and into a taxi headed for Simon's child care home.
When we arrived we waited in a meeting room for Simon, we didn't talk, but kept giving each other teary looks of "THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING!" After a few minutes his caretaker came in carrying him. He was wearing traditional Chinese clothes and he looked so little and afraid but just like I imagined from the pictures we had loved of him for the past 18 months. As much as he possibly could, Simon knew what was happening. They had told him that he was getting a mommy and a daddy and he knew that meant he was leaving with us. He warmed up to Taylor quickly and me less quickly. We spent three days visiting him in his child care home, trying to learn about his routines and medical needs and helping him become more familiar with us. By the end of the second day he was laughing and playing with us. He was a big fan of Taylor's whiskers and my arm hair (still is). I was a big fan of his little toes and the way he covered his mouth when he laughed. (still am) We were so ready for him to be ours.
His caregivers threw him a goodbye party on the morning of the third day and he said goodbye to everyone he loved. So did we, and we were so grateful to all if them for the love and care they had given our little boy. At that point they knew him better and understood him better than we did and that felt so scary to us and, of course, to Simon. Simon didn't cry as we were leaving, but in the car he fell right asleep in my lap and I think it was his way of dealing with what was happening.
After arriving at our hotel our social worker stayed with us for a while and we tried to feed Simon and get him to take a longer nap. He was acting tired and sad. It was stressful. He wouldn't eat or sleep and I was worried that our social worker was doubting my ability to care for our little boy. (She probably wasn't, but I think I was doubting myself and so it made me feel that way.) I was also not feeling well at all--courtesy of probably a lot of stress and strange (to me) food. I prayed silently really hard and held Simon and he fell asleep on my lap again.
After he was finally sleeping our social worker and Taylor left to make a trip to the grocery store and it was just me and Simon for the first time ever. I could finally just stare at him and touch his hair and whisper things to him that I had been dying to say for months. I was aching so much for time with him, to be close to him. I still kind of am. I miss the first three years of his life, and I'm so thankful for the last nine months and all the years ahead.
His caregivers threw him a goodbye party on the morning of the third day and he said goodbye to everyone he loved. So did we, and we were so grateful to all if them for the love and care they had given our little boy. At that point they knew him better and understood him better than we did and that felt so scary to us and, of course, to Simon. Simon didn't cry as we were leaving, but in the car he fell right asleep in my lap and I think it was his way of dealing with what was happening.
After arriving at our hotel our social worker stayed with us for a while and we tried to feed Simon and get him to take a longer nap. He was acting tired and sad. It was stressful. He wouldn't eat or sleep and I was worried that our social worker was doubting my ability to care for our little boy. (She probably wasn't, but I think I was doubting myself and so it made me feel that way.) I was also not feeling well at all--courtesy of probably a lot of stress and strange (to me) food. I prayed silently really hard and held Simon and he fell asleep on my lap again.
After he was finally sleeping our social worker and Taylor left to make a trip to the grocery store and it was just me and Simon for the first time ever. I could finally just stare at him and touch his hair and whisper things to him that I had been dying to say for months. I was aching so much for time with him, to be close to him. I still kind of am. I miss the first three years of his life, and I'm so thankful for the last nine months and all the years ahead.
